Getting off of autopilot.
Join me for Enough as You Are: A 3-week Journaling Adventure, beginning on Monday, September 30th. A daily journaling practice can help so much with increased self-awareness, stress reduction and enhanced creativity. I’ve been off my journal game for a while and am excited to gather with others to give some focused energy on self-reflection and self-love through journaling. Details HERE.
Hi Friends,
Coming at you from Trento Italy, where yesterday I attended my friends’ wedding in a 12th century castle perched atop a hill surrounded by apple orchards. It was a glorious, love-filled event in a stunning location, but rather than share a picture of the castle or the view, I thought I’d share a picture of some of the creamiest, most delicious gelato I’ve ever tasted. Three scoops — hazelnut, pistachio and stracciatella (chocolate chip) — with whipped cream on top. Delizioso!
Earlier in the week I spent a few nights in one of my favorite places on the planet, the Dolomites (Italian Alps). My first morning there I pushed myself to get out of bed and go for a swim in the rooftop pool. I was the only one up there. It was chilly out, in the mid-50s, and the heated pool felt like a warm bath. I swam some breast stroke laps and then sat in front of one of the jacuzzi jets and let it massage my lower back, as I gazed at the jagged peaks of two prominent mountains nearby. I felt so relaxed, so good about having chosen to get out of bed and go for a swim. The perfect way to start the day.
It got me thinking, yet again, about how important it is to be intentional with the choices we make, and how choosing things that support our lives in a positive way really does add more meaning and joy to our experience.
I’ve felt fairly ungrounded for large parts of this year. I’ve been consuming a lot of cannabis, a lot of sugar, and a lot of TV. I haven’t been spending much time in Nature, or taking long walks with regularity, or meditating, or journal writing. I’m not judging any of these choices as good or bad; that gelato pictured above had a lot of cream and sugar and it brought me a bunch of joy. At the same time, I’ve aware that when I’m eating edibles more often or watching hours of TV at night, I tend to feel less fulfilled in my life.**
It reminds me of the question: Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Have I been numbing myself with pot and TV because I’ve been feeling off and ungrounded, or have I been feeling off and ungrounded because I’ve been numbing myself with pot and TV, et al. Probably a combination of both. What I know for sure is that simply making (what I consider to be) healthy choices doesn’t mean I’m automatically going to feel great about myself and my life. If only. At the same time, when I’m prioritizing my joy, or physical well-being, or connection with loved ones, and making choices that support all of those things, I often feel more joyful, and physically healthy, and connected. Choices matter. Intention matters.
It’s easy for me to feel more content with my choices when I’m sitting in a heated pool on the roof of my lovely Italian hotel with an unobstructed view of the Dolomites. Joy is not hard to come by in that place. It’s my daily life at home that needs more intention. And rather than deciding to eliminate pot and sugar and TV from my life, I feel more inclined to integrate more of what I know feels good (a morning ritual, walking, journaling, etc.) and see how those choices affect (or not) others that haven’t necessarily felt as great. If I’m meditating or practicing breathwork in the morning, that means I’m not on my phone scrolling. If I’ve made plans to have dinner and take a walk with a friend at night, that means I’m not sitting in front of the TV. I don’t have to force myself to put down my phone or turn off the TV (two things I haven’t been able to force myself to do these days); I just have to choose to do other things I enjoy that don’t accommodate the scrolling or the TV.
Sometimes it’s just easier to choose to do one thing (i.e. morning meditation) than to choose not to do something else (i.e. morning social media scrolling).
When I get home from this trip in a couple days, my intention is to reignite a morning routine, which will include journaling, meditation or breathwork, and not touching my phone for at least an hour after I wake up (made easier by the journaling and meditation or breathwork I intend to do). I’m offering the 3-week journaling adventure as much for me as I am for everyone else. A morning journal-writing practice is as grounding as anything else I’ve discovered. And I’ve found that when I start the day intentionally, with what I consider to be good-for-me choices, it often sets my day in motion in a more fulfilling way.
As I wrote in Enough as You Are…
Living with intention doesn’t mean everything falls into place exactly as I intend it to (though it improves the odds, for sure). It means I believe that everything is energy and that my life is important enough to consciously consider my choices. It means that being intentional feels a lot better, and stands to create more exciting outcomes, than drifting through my days on autopilot.
How about you? Is there anything you’d like to be more intentional about doing? Any choices you want to integrate into your daily life that you believe will create a bit more meaning, or connection, or fulfillment? If so, let me know.
No matter how you are showing up for yourself, and for your life, please remember that you are enough, and you are worthy, just as you are. Remember to offer yourself grace when you’re not making what you consider to be the healthiest choices, and that you can choose again at any time. Self-love does not require anything of you in order for you to be worthy of your own compassion and love. You do, however, have to commit to loving yourself, in order to really start loving yourself. And why wouldn’t you? Why wouldn’t we all?
Big Big Love to you all,
Scott
** In the US we tend to have a wildly unhealthy relationship with productivity and are wired to feel better when we’re being productive, and sadly, to feel bad/ashamed/less than when we’re not. I am committed to being kind to and loving myself no matter what choices I’m making, whether I view them as productive and healthy or not. I think it’s important to consider how much of my conditioning around productivity plays into how disappointed I can feel in myself for having days when I don’t do much of anything at all. At the same time, I get really excited when I have a productive day and want to feel okay about that, even if the excitement is tied to my conditioning. Bottom line: we are expansive energetic beings, and we are also conditioned within an inch of our lives. I’m interested in holding space for both those realities with as much grace as possible as I navigate through my life.
I too am working to re-engage in a morning practice that is more intentional. A morning walk, now that it’s fall-ish and cool. Creating intentions for my day, with the understanding that this is NOT the same as a giant to do list. Leveraging some of my favorite apps for bite sized inspiration and meditation/breathwork practices AND nourishing myself with healthy food. Like you, I’m engaging in a lot of distractions and auto-pilot activities and am getting curious about the impacts of my choices. Thanks for this Scott.
I always read your emails and always take something from them, but this resonated extra deeply today. I agree with all of it, and have also been finding it difficult to nourish myself with ‘healthy’ habits for a while, whatever those are for me. It’s a nice reminder that we can start again and how important one small decision and step are. As I’ve been living in near
constant anxiety the past few years and heavy self-criticism most of my life, it’s just super reassuring to hear another human whom I respect and love so much open up about how they make not healthy decisions sometimes too. And how that’s perfectly normal and okay. The stories we tell ourselves about how so many other people live “better” than us get quieter when we’re real with each other. Miss being around your energy and sending you love, Scott! Thank you.